what are paraprosdokians...and why do i care?

i received this concept via e-mail this past week; e-mails can be very enlightening!

paraprosdokians -- by definition: (a) figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation. the example given was: "where there's a will, i want to be in it!" another example i found later on came from groucho marx: "i've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it!"

this definition was followed by 38 examples. a few stuck me, and so i thought i'd share a few paraprosdokians and comment about them.

"war does not determine who is right -- only who is left." one could go many directions with this; right and wrong; liberal and conservative. but if you sit with this thought for a while, you begin to think about the wisdom of that statement. there really are no winners in a conflicted situation or a war. the 'winners' have gotten their way, perhaps, but with much casualty. within the win is a loss or many losses. we often simply 'move on' and never reflect on what it took to get to this new reality. i often think of winning in terms of power. sometimes we do not know our own power. and when we do not know our own capabilities, we discover, sometimes too late, the casualties that helped us achieve our win. upon reflection, we can not win without understanding what also we have lost . . . .

"knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad." i laughed about this because it is summer, and most people who planted tomatoes, have them coming out of their ears. people give them away; make things and give them away; cook them until they are blue in the face. i can imagine, perhaps, that the next pot-luck i go to will have 'grape tomatoes' in amongst the melons and the berries and peaches/plums/bananas. the sign will read: fruit salad, with a new grape variety. that's a little summer humor, but i'm guessing, if it hasn't happened yet, grape tomatoes will become this centruies' friendliest fruit! what do you think?

"a bus station is where a bus stops. a train station is where a train stops. on my desk, i have a work station." so, i was at my 'work station' as i was reading the e-mail about paraprosdokians. all i could do was laugh! my desk is just covered with piles of 'to be completed' stuff. things are 'en route, in transit, and to be completed'. when i first entered ministry, i prided myself on making sure that my desk was cleared when i went home each night...sometimes, it was a very long day! then i did a sermon on the seven deadly sins, of which pride is one. so, i changed from pride to being proud. what i discovered was that i always had to remember what i was working on, and dig it out the next day. now, experience has taught me that, like windows on a pc, i can keep several things going at a time, and i do not have to complete one task before i begin another. thus, my work station never stops, but is 'to be completed'. now...on to the next one. . .

'i asked god for a bike, but i know god doesn't work that way. so i stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.' now, intellectually, i know that sentence #2 isn't suppose to work, and that in sentence #1, god really doesn't work that way either! BUT, there are DAYS! we're called to be discerning; invite god to lead us; however, there are days when i don't get the 'hint from god' that i need, and just wish god would spell it out! we seem to live in a society in which asking for forgiveness is easier than figuring out 'the way, the truth, and the life'. what we rarely realize until after we've had to ask for forgiveness, is that asking to be forgiven can be much harder. maybe if we did more asking before we just took what we wanted, we'd be in a better space. just a thought . . . .

and finally, the one i love to quote: 'going to church doesn't make you a christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.' the trouble with this quote is that it can feel a little judgmental. and, having grown up in a home where judgment was constant, i am learning that i really do not want to be a judge. i want to be a spiritual christian that is involved and relational and invites people to tell me more, rather than winning or being the know it all. kind of goes back to the first paraprosdokian -- when we seek to be the winner, loss is all around us. of course, i'm not sure i want to always be 'the loser' all the time either! maybe what we really need is to get the world to buy into another favorite saying: it is not whether we win or lose, but how we played the game...i bet someone made a paraprosdokian out of this statement! what do you think?