anam cara, anybody?

i am part of what our church conference is calling a 'circuit leader'; about 50 of us host circuits of church pastors -- my circuit has seven pastors in it -- and we gather for mutual support and accountability as we focus to 'make disciples of jesus christ'.

so who knew, when the circuit leaders gathered this past week in alamo for a meeting, that it would be no ordinary meeting! outside our room was this wonderful meditative garden -- pictured to your right -- that simply invited you in.

one of the first questions asked was, 'what does a disciple, in this day and age, look like?' great question! do you have an idea in your mind as you are reading this? then we were handed the book, anam cara; collegial clergy communities
by mahan siler. ok; now, this looks more like a regular meeting, and less like the meditative garden!

so what is anam cara, you ask? it is a way that redefines ministry. anam cara embodies a shift from seeing ourselves working solo to identifying ourselves as pastors in peer community (page 7). steve hyde says, he can no longer imagine doing pastoral ministry without his group of soul friends. well, this made me think of small groups.

we spend so much of our lives in isolation; our society encourages this; think about our office space or cubicles; commuting; competition for advancement; we are not a society that builds a lot of trust with co-workers, and the result is that we are diminished in so many ways.

the meditative garden reminded me that i am not alone, even though that garden seems like a space where you'd like to be alone with your own thoughts. but imagine being in a setting with that kind of beauty, talking about real life stuff; i believe that is an awesome place to open up one's fears, joys, deep-seeded secrets, and to become vulnerable enough to ask for help. and imagine, being open enough and building up enough trust, that you wouldn't mind if god heard too!


what if we had a place as we (the merced church) were seeking to discern those difficult future decisions? what would happen if we had a group (we do; we are forming small groups) to wrestle with the issues that face us; not only the future of our church, but our very own future -- our loved ones, our very lives, and the reality that we will not be here forever; don't we want to share with the unforeseen future the richness of life that we have experienced?

here is another view of that meditation garden; the path leads to a door; what does that door symbolize for you? is this a path you would risk taking? is it even a path you could venture to cross? who do you talk to about such issues in your life? or do you allow yourself time to even have such fleeting thoughts?


the dedication page of anam cara is addressed to the chutzpa of pastors, but i believe it is a good place for all of us to start:
the courage, week after week, to declare the gracious reality of god with words that fall short every time;
the courage to stand with conviction, offering an alternative worldview of shalom to the dominant culture of competitive, often violent ways of relating;
the courage to enter, upon invitation, into the private places of a person's life and be there with presence, faith and sometimes sight;
the courage to call for surrender to the christ spirit that takes us often where we do not wish to go;
the courage to be a flawed leader (or follower) of an imperfect institution that frequently contradicts the compassion it espouses;
and the courage to bear the symbols of god, even be a symbol of god, at the perilous risk of playing god.

i'm wondering....is this the community we want to be? can we build such a community? can we live into such a community as the peaceable kin-dom? do we have this kind of courage?