moving ants....and herding cats

i have come to believe that working with faithful church people can be like moving ants ... and herding cats! honestly! let me tell you my funny 'sad' story.

before it rained here in merced on sunday, the ants had all come looking for water. i finally had to put out liquid poison, hoping to ward them off; trouble was that the liquid they were suppose to carry back to their hives, killed them before they got there, and so they just moved to another spot in the house; i ended up chasing them; what's wrong with this picture?

cats, as you know, have a mind and a life of their own. they just don't give you the time of day unless they choose to give your their time and their part of the day. otherwise, you're nothing but a pain in their day. i like cats, but i can't figure out the reason i do to save my soul.

so, how are ants and cats like faithful church folk? well, like ants, you put out opportunities, and some go for the 'bate', and others move to another location. the ones who are taking the bate here in the united methodist church of merced, are really having an opportunity, so i understand, in getting to know themselves and others better, and to clarify their own belief system. they are being thoughtful about what we need to be doing next to risk changing our direction. the others who have not taken advantage of our small group opportunities may seem a little lost, but are continuing on their journey; we may end up at the same place, but the ones who have participated in the journey will inevitably have the advantage of having part of the ownership in the new ministry we do.

like herding cats, not everyone will be willing to come along. but our aim is not to necessarily focus on the current needs of our congregation. well, that may not be true either. the current need of our congregation is to help focus our attention on the ministry in our community that will make a spiritual difference now and in the future. cats don't always come on board in this way.

we're planning to meet in november with our leadership to discuss one of the first major changes we will make in our visioning process; worship and education. currently we have our more praise style service at 9 with an education program, fellowship time, our more traditional service at 10:30, fellowship time (heaven forbid that united methodists would give up fellowship time!), followed by our hmong education program and then hmong worship.

one of the ideas is to combine our education programs into one hour, and flip the praise worship with the traditional worship; hmong worship would stand on its own as usual. what difference would it make, you wonder? well, in general, many of our traditional folks wake earlier than our praise people. and there has been a request to combine our children's education program. often it is more difficult for our hmong households to be at church even by 10. so we are dealing with many factors, including 'late night saturday night folks'.

another prospect is dealing with a whole population of folks that are hardly visible...young adults. and there are two areas of young adults; students and singles/young families/couples. so a group of folks will be working on what we're calling 'the new ministry'. more about that another time.

my question for you today is, what moves you spiritually, and what are you longing for? some of your answers may reflect about worship, some about education/spiritual growth, and some about fellowship. you may even long for something that doesn't happen on sundays; that's ok; your thoughtful feedback is appreciated. and, are you an ant or a cat or some other 'anamal'?

anam cara, anybody?

i am part of what our church conference is calling a 'circuit leader'; about 50 of us host circuits of church pastors -- my circuit has seven pastors in it -- and we gather for mutual support and accountability as we focus to 'make disciples of jesus christ'.

so who knew, when the circuit leaders gathered this past week in alamo for a meeting, that it would be no ordinary meeting! outside our room was this wonderful meditative garden -- pictured to your right -- that simply invited you in.

one of the first questions asked was, 'what does a disciple, in this day and age, look like?' great question! do you have an idea in your mind as you are reading this? then we were handed the book, anam cara; collegial clergy communities
by mahan siler. ok; now, this looks more like a regular meeting, and less like the meditative garden!

so what is anam cara, you ask? it is a way that redefines ministry. anam cara embodies a shift from seeing ourselves working solo to identifying ourselves as pastors in peer community (page 7). steve hyde says, he can no longer imagine doing pastoral ministry without his group of soul friends. well, this made me think of small groups.

we spend so much of our lives in isolation; our society encourages this; think about our office space or cubicles; commuting; competition for advancement; we are not a society that builds a lot of trust with co-workers, and the result is that we are diminished in so many ways.

the meditative garden reminded me that i am not alone, even though that garden seems like a space where you'd like to be alone with your own thoughts. but imagine being in a setting with that kind of beauty, talking about real life stuff; i believe that is an awesome place to open up one's fears, joys, deep-seeded secrets, and to become vulnerable enough to ask for help. and imagine, being open enough and building up enough trust, that you wouldn't mind if god heard too!


what if we had a place as we (the merced church) were seeking to discern those difficult future decisions? what would happen if we had a group (we do; we are forming small groups) to wrestle with the issues that face us; not only the future of our church, but our very own future -- our loved ones, our very lives, and the reality that we will not be here forever; don't we want to share with the unforeseen future the richness of life that we have experienced?

here is another view of that meditation garden; the path leads to a door; what does that door symbolize for you? is this a path you would risk taking? is it even a path you could venture to cross? who do you talk to about such issues in your life? or do you allow yourself time to even have such fleeting thoughts?


the dedication page of anam cara is addressed to the chutzpa of pastors, but i believe it is a good place for all of us to start:
the courage, week after week, to declare the gracious reality of god with words that fall short every time;
the courage to stand with conviction, offering an alternative worldview of shalom to the dominant culture of competitive, often violent ways of relating;
the courage to enter, upon invitation, into the private places of a person's life and be there with presence, faith and sometimes sight;
the courage to call for surrender to the christ spirit that takes us often where we do not wish to go;
the courage to be a flawed leader (or follower) of an imperfect institution that frequently contradicts the compassion it espouses;
and the courage to bear the symbols of god, even be a symbol of god, at the perilous risk of playing god.

i'm wondering....is this the community we want to be? can we build such a community? can we live into such a community as the peaceable kin-dom? do we have this kind of courage?

invocation....chicken....advocacy

i had the opportunity to once again, pronounce the invocation at the merced city council meeting on monday night. i prayed that our leaders in these difficult economic times would come to compassionate decisions particularly for the most vulnerable in our community; the children the homeless, and those without adequate health and mental health care.

i believe we at the united methodist church seek to respond to everyone in the best possible ways that we can. we helped to sponsor the wesley foundation bbq chicken dinner on saturday...what preparation goes into the care of chicken, let me tell you! the picture above shows that we united methodists are a clean lot!

but the real secret to the success of such a 'fun-draiser' isn't all the ingredients or the hours of labor; it's the dedication, and the willingness of those who serve.

the picture below gives a new concept to 'men at work'. yet our care for one another and our dedication to the community is undisputed.

we have a group of women who prepare and serve food for those living at the creek; the city council will make decisions about their living space this evening.

our social action team sponsors a monthly food distribution; our tuesday 'children at the church' after school program provides dinner for participants and their families during the school year; one of our christmas eve services is dedicated to providing a meal for those in our neighborhood.

but there's more! our social action team is also exploring ways to 'step up' our care for our most vulnerable sisters and brothers. we are talking about advocacy. jesus reminds us that 'the poor you will have with you always', and i believe by that he means that our care for others will be unceasing. and, i believe, as we care for others, jesus is in the midst of such care.

we can pray unceasingly. we can bbq until we run out of food. advocacy may allow us to raise a collective consciousness to empower long-lasting care, not simply the immediate needs to be attended to. what can we do? do you have an idea?

talk to our representatives, write a personal note to those empowered to make the needed changes, and offer your time to make a difference to others.

what's your take on what needs to be done? and by the way, buying a chicken dinner isn't possible this week...we sold out! thank you for your support of our young adult/college student ministry.

too many passwords....

i had such a difficult time getting to blog today....different companies require different types of passwords, and i had to land on the correct one for this account; passwords are ok, except this account added another security word that you have to type, so that they know you are really human, and not a machine. honestly, i think you have to be a machine to figure out that word, don't you?

anyway, i really meant to share that i had the pleasure to celebrate the renewal of vows for a couple married 60 years this past week-end. they had kept their original vows, and we used them, with a slight adaptation. what a powerful affirmation to know that couples can stay married for over a year or two. 60! i'll never experience that, sadly enough. but what a powerful witness that in this day and age, it can happen!

i also had the opportunity this week to witness the opening of the new wesley center at u.c. berkeley. for those thinking about attending school there, this housing/spiritual center is directly across the street; eight suites of 12 students each, provide a safe haven for study and growth.

here in merced, we are excited to have a wesley house with six students living in an intentional community for growth and nurture in a spiritual way. how excited the wesley brothers, john and charles, would be to know that their little societies from their oxford days, have lived on and developed into intentional living communities! and we are excited to anticipate with the goto family this week, the birth of campus minister jennifer's daughter....prayers for baby girl goto!

spiritual growth is a life-long process. perhaps the complication of too many passwords could be eliminated, if all of us could use the same word...believe. i realize this defeats the security of a password, but the concept is the same. if the only password we needed was 'believe' -- even when we didn't fully understand what we believed -- at least we would be able to profess that we believe -- something!

with wesley, believing was something that came to us -- and still comes to us -- by means of grace; "prevenient grace", meaning, god is there before us, yearning for us to learn and grow, and to learn to be faithful. we can be faithful in so many ways. we can believe in so many ways. maybe the password 'believe' is our entry into saying, 'i'm not sure what i believe, but i know i have to believe something'.

be it from childhood, into our teens and young adulthood years, or far into our maturing, god's grace is there, ready and waiting for us to find our belief. even discovering jesus doesn't mean that be all believe the same way.

i'm excited to witness the merced college and u.c. merced students find their way onto their spiritual path. and it makes me hopeful to know that, while i have not been able to sustain a 60 year loving relationship with someone else (well, i am only 52!), that god has maintained a (so far) 52 year loving relationship with me. i'm still on the journey. i've learned to appreciate women and ethnic diversity in ministerial leadership; i've learned that my own white-maleness of privilege has caused hurt and oppression; i've learned to breathe in the spirit of prayer, and that i don't always have to be 'right' or 'in charge' or 'the center of attention'. maturity has its advantages!!!

so, what have you learned on your spiritual journey so far, that you would be willing to share? you never know how your journey will make an impact on someone else!

centenarians....i'll be there in 48 years!

the united methodist church in livingston (ca) celebrated their centennial this past week-end! wah-hoo! even bishop brown was there. while i was in sacramento (central), we celebrated their 150th! i graduated from high school, and we were the class of 1976 -- the 250th year of our nation. longevity is a big deal! it is a time for celebration -- and stay up-to-date.

one of my new best friends if 'the costco connection'; it comes out monthly, and i love to read about this and that; this september issue had a brief article entitled, 'be on top with pop', about pop culture and the latest trends, and results from 100 centenarians that were interviewed for this article! the secrets of longevity? laughter and prayer, along with, of course, being socially active, eating healthy, exercising, and getting enough sleep.

but they noted that 8% of the centenarians texted or instant messaged. wow! now that's up-to-date! 1/3 of those interviewed eat organic foods!

we here at the united methodist church in merced, have two centenarians; they are being cared for by their daughters, and they live at home, and they get out and about! awesome! what we could learn from them....how they have seen the world change.

change. staying current. remembering the past, and living into the future. these are things that keep us living -- plus, of course, laughter and prayer!

i invite you to take some time when we finishing reading this blog today, and reflect upon the changes that have taken place in your lifetime. having celebrated my 52nd birthday this past week, i remember learning to type on a manual typewriter, then transitioning to a portable electric, and finally keyboarding on a computer. yet, i still write, and like to receive handwritten notes, even though e-mails and texting are quick and personal too. we don't have to do just one or the other; we can celebrate the things we liked in the past, and enjoy new technology. the best of both worlds. it will keep us growing and learning, and moving; stopping and planting our feet in the ground (besides realizing that is what a two-year-old does!), doesn't get us anywhere. and isn't moving with the spirit what life is about?

here at the united methodist church of merced, we are in a world of change. and we don't know what that change will look like yet. but we are inviting everyone to share in the journey. we have developed small groups, who are reading a blueprint for discipleship by kevin watson; in it, he helps us take john wesley's ideas (the founder of methodism back in england in the 1700's), and explore them in a contemporary way. 'do no harm, do good, and practice the christian disciplines (put your faith into 'action')' are things that have worked for people growing in their faith for hundreds of years. when we stop growing, well....you know!

we know we have having to change. and believe me, i understand it is not easy, or for some, even desirable. but you know what? based on the story of creation, each new day was an adventure; something new, and it hasn't stopped yet. sure, we were encouraged to rest! but we have never been told to do the 'same old, same old'. only to step out in faith.....

so, are you envisioning yourself as a centenarian? can you believe that you can learn something new once each day? do you have the faith to practice what you've learned to make them, natural, so that you might say to yourself, "how in the world did i get along all these years without...(fill in the blank)?!"

we also had a new birth in the congregation last week. can you imagine what he'll experience in the next 100 years? Wouldn't it be great for him and for you, to have a mentor in his faith development? Or, if not mentoring him, discover who you might want to mentor. Who mentored you? How do we help each other and our world reach the years ahead?

it's not too late! spend some time learning and growing; share yourself and your wisdom and your faith with someone else. and, if you haven't done so already, send a note to someone who has mentored you, just to say thanks. and if that person is no longer living, live your life as a thanksgiving to their faith in you!

care to share a story of someone who has made an impact on your life? they don't have to be a centenarian....they could be anyone! the gift is in the sharing.....

troubling times, but not without hope

these are, indeed, troubling times; 'remembering 9/11' brings up many emotions, and responses; some responses are troubling to say the least.





for instance, what good does it due for someone to burn a holy book? book burning is useless, and undignified, and only draws more attention to the issue at hand. the qu'ran is a book that holds a belief. we may not agree with everything in it -- as the christian faith does not agree on all points in the bible, but are there insights in the qu'ran worth exploring? no doubt. does burning a written history of belief make it disappear, or heal a wound, or make one feel better? i think no! we do have the freedom not to read and become aware. perhaps we might put our energy into making that choice rather than striking a match.

much in the same way, hate groups provide no redeeming qualities. such is the case happening in madera, ca; with a group targeting the muslim people, planned parenthood, the united methodist church, the sheriffs department.... as a faith people, should not our energies be better placed in working toward justice, and serving god by eliminating oppression; focusing on health, wholeness, compassion, peace, love? i know my soul is inspired when i can participate in living kindness and hope.

perhaps, the troubling times in which we live, really are about finding hope. so let me share a couple of 'hope-filled' things.





yesterday, i was invited to a cross-country race for our four community middle-schools. this picture to the right shows the seventh grade girls about to run...the ready, set and (cover your ears) sound of the gun...they're off! running by the beautiful yosemite lake near u.c. merced....what a wonderful location for healthy competition!

and i didn't notice any attitude that would interfere with 'doing ones best'. nothing but encouragement and support. and great diversity! in these troubling times, we are not without hope!

following the races -- there were six of them, i journeyed onto the u.c. campus that is growing and expanding. one of the insights i had was that if we are going to connect with students in a relational way, we have to learn how to text! without that form of communication, we'll never be able to relate to these times.

i was blessed by the wesley club on campus, hosting the missionary and photo journalist, paul jeffery. his photos tell the story of our world that is filled with hazards and vulnerability. our invitation in these troubling times, is to become aware, respond, and yes, build hope. we cannot respond to every need, but we can be involved with one area, and become better informed and actively involved! We can become empowered to empower others; we can become relational, by helping others relate. Being aware....that conflict minerals is the new conflict diamonds in africa; that solidarity can happen by becoming involved in taking a stand, as it did in a clothing factory where environmental issues were being ignored. we could watch 'charlie wilson's war', and listen to the ending that was overlooked by others.

we can educate ourselves by diving into information about the congo, the sudan, darfur, and finding out where our clothing is being made -- and by whom....children, perhaps? and by the time those middle school age pre-teens (that were racing here in merced) reach the age of 22 in another country, they are used up, and tossed out and must find new employment....at the age of 22! i'm turning 52 this week! i must be really over the hill....but no one has ever turned me out of a job because i'm useless. i can only imagine what that is like.

in these troubling times, we cannot rely only on a soundbite from the news, or a headline from a paper. when something troubles us, we need to listen to that spirit-led urging, and begin to explore. from where does our hope come? where do you find hope?

what could god possibly be saying to you in these troubling times? how are you going to respond?

no labor on labor day, 2010

blessed week to you!

i decided to try and post once each week; i shared last week on a monday, but as yesterday was labor day, i decided not to labor....even though putting thoughts to paper isn't that much labor, i am posting today. i will try and post early in the week, for the most part....

for those in merced and in the surrounding area, i invite you to take time to see playhouse merced's production of 'joseph and the amazing technicolor dream coat'. what a fun-filled show, and exciting costumes! this last week-end, they supported the community by fund-raising for the 16 displaced families from a recent merced fire. entertainment AND community support; awesome! and, because so many people think the old testament is not worth a read....seeing this production reminds folks that this kind of living continues in our day and time. family strife, unique business planning, natural disaster, and reunification. this could be 21st century america, rather than b.c. egypt!

a reminder from sunday's sermon on what jesus meant about ... hate: hate is what we express in many ways, but for those on their journey of christian faith, hate is meant by jesus to mean an action that responds to anything that gets in our way from following jesus. the 'church phrase' we use is 'discipleship'. but for those on this journey of faith, we realize that it is difficult to always faithfully follow jesus, because....well, let's be honest, jesus can get in our way. and i believe that is what jesus knew all along. striving to live faithfully is really hard work. it is probably the hardest thing we do on a daily basis.

but i don't know what i'd do in my life if i weren't on this path....and i'm not sure i want to find out; do you? i already know those times in my life when i'm focused on myself exclusively. i forget there are others around....not such great results. do you know what i mean? (you could even share an example if you'd like!)

so, instead of working on labor day, i stopped to smell the roses. i actually sat in my little yard that i worked so hard to make a retreat center ... but never really was able to enjoy. i listened to my 'crack-ed pot' fountain, heard the sounds of neighbors and the sounds of our community, and enjoyed the flowers i planted in spring -- that have, for the most part, survived the summer heat! it was the reward i received from actually hand-watering a number of my plants throughout the summer; usually hearing myself say, 'i really need to enjoy my yard...some day!' labor day was it; listening to classical music from the house, enjoying morning coffee, lunching on a chef salad and freshly brewed iced tea -- i was even the chef! it was a wonderful morning, as the sun consumes the yard in the afternoon.

the heat came, and off to see eat-pray-love. who says there's nothing to do in merced?! if you haven't seen a movie in a while, why not see eatpraylove -- based on a book i have yet to read, but i suspect it is a good read, also! there are many great 'one liners' in that movie, with a great cast. it has been out for a while, but the theatre was full! the story revolves around a woman who needs to find her center -- kind of like trying to find yourself, only from a spiritual sense. anyway, she spends a year away -- eating, learning to meditate, and discovering love (for really the first time). one of the lines i remember is 'to get to the castle, you have to swim the moat'. profound. true. honest.

nicely put. and as i look at my life, the goals i yearned to achieve, were not accomplished without the swim. the swim can feel daunting. sometimes i'd rather just veg, honestly, thank you very much. and then that's what i feel like; a veggie that's sat; limp, drying up, and aimless. when i risk the toe-in-the-water, i feel much more accomplished -- even when i haven't reached my goal. the castle is really about the journey, isn't it? who you meet, the relationships that develop, the decisions you make and the things you do, as well as the 'you' that you discover, by the grace of god.

so my question to you is, what is preventing your swim....today? blessings.....